A shrew comes to the festival

While working at a festival in a beautiful park in New Jersey, my early Saturday morning calm and preparation was shattered by an elegantly dressed woman screaming her need for assistance, not asking a particular person, not a request, a demand for service from any peon available.  Amusing, but I volunteered my services - trying to extricate a large boxed table from her back seat, all the while listening to the poor me's, and blaming me and anyone within earshot for her frustration and exasperation.  Remained calm.  Got her display table set up and moved on to her tent.  Oh, boy.

I had told her as I walked over to help that my bride, Shirley, would recommend that she not rely on me for any form of practical, handyman assistance.  I let her know I broke the first popup tent that I tried to deploy about a year ago.  My second tent was broken before I installed it, but held out and was then disposed of in a garbage can.  I digress.

The shrew asked: "You know how to put up a tent!?"

My response:  "No, but I'm willing to help you and give it a try."

She gruffly dismissed me and then asked the young man at the tent next to her, actually she didn't ask, she ordered him to help her.  He tried. Her tent was broken and she went without a tent for the weekend.  Did I mention that she represented The New York Times, and felt superior, smarter than, and above the rest of we hoipolloi? Perhaps reflect of The Times self-righteous above the crowd, we know better philosophy of her employer.

If that were the end of the story, you would not be reading this.  She spent the weekend yelling, not speaking, to anyone within earshot, and I mean long earshot.  "Ladies and Gentlemen, come here and get two beautiful presents when you sign up for THE New York Times. I am here!  The New York Times is here! You must talk to me.  I can save you 50% today." And on and on, adnauseam.  She was not speaking to potential subscribers walking by her.  She was screaming to anyone and everyone within earshot.  Drove many of us nuts.

Did I mention her courtesy when folks tried to help?  For instance, several dollar bills blew away in the strong winds we experienced.  Others picked them up and returned them.  No thank you.  Just an expectation that others will come to her aid.  Same with her lead slips that blew all over.  Did she do anything to pick up her mess.  Nada. Nope.  No.

One herb vendor finally had enough and asked the organizer to speak with her.  The tone came down a bit, but I will take his advice and ask my location to be moved if she is ever with me, and near me, at another event.  Shirley asked why I had helped her at all.  Very good question.  I am still thinking about.  No good reason comes to mind.