The good news is that as a result of 33 plus years as a friend of Bill, I feel. The bad news is that I feel. Art is now in hospice and slipping away moment by moment. Perhaps it brings me back to my one and only up close and personal experience with death, the passing of Raj's wife at age 38 after just six weeks in North Shore University Hospital. This was in the days before the hospice movement when dying patients were placed at the end of the hall away from nurses and other staff who were uncomfortable with handling dying patients and thier families. I was there along with her daughter, age 17, and a friend. She was in pain, moaning, and winding down, like watching a clock slow down. Have not experienced that again.
My emotions with Art are raw. One moment, I am fine and can accept. Then I break down and weep, or have a trembling voice as I try to speak. That was the case in leaving a message for Alie today. It just strikes at the core of our existence, our lives, our shared loss. Art has been a part of me and my life for some 37 years. He gave life to my wife. He was skiing 5 days a week at age 85 and now this slow and gradual closing down. Each phone call might be the news. Is that good news or bad. The answer is Yes. We are ready for him to transitiuon into his next life and we are not.
Let go and let God. Good advice for us and for Art. God speed on your journey.
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